I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize