it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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