well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize