Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
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