The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
