new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
where does the pee come out of this thing
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
