My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize