on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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