yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
