That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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