grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize