somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
