You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Quick, to the slutcave!
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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