You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize