come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
