I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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