When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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