I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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