He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize