im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
wanna go halves on a baby?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Randomize
