Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
