You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
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He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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