i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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