There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
