Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize