If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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