You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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