Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
