I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize