Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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