i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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