Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(737): View more from Texas

You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?

(1-737): View more from Texas

That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there

(737): View more from Texas

It's my parent's restaurant

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(360): View more from Washington

Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.

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(251): View more from Alabama

Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(815): View more from Illinois

my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right

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(732): View more from New Jersey

hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night

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(253): View more from Washington

i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit

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