If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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