Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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