Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
