Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
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I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
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I think a kid would responsible me up
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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