i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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