he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize