Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
