Me too!
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
