So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
