I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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