i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
