I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
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