I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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