For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
