so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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