the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
