Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
