and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I don't think brook has ever known best
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
